Category: 
Love for the Bay Area that needs to come out:
Dyke March. Good Vibrations. Chapel of the Chimes. Naan N Curry. The Parkway. Folsom St. Fair. Trannyshack. The mass amounts of very attractive gay men. And the fact that I can have my girlfriend and my dog and sell dildos all day and not really stand out as being anything other than just another San Francisco dykefamilymember.
Negativity that needs to come out:
I hate you, San Francisco Department of Parking and Traffic, and I will hate you forever and ever.
And onto more pressing (pushing? thrusting?) matters….
Common questions about vaginal fisting:
Isn’t it going to stretch me out and make my cooch all floppy and loose and won’t my boyfriend complain that I’m not tight enough anymore?
No. You won’t become floppy. If anything, you will become so much more aware of all the muscles down there, because most women (especially when they’re just beginning) have to consciously relax and practice and let those muscles de-tense and de-clench. The more aware you are of your muscles, the more you will know when they’re in shape and when they’re not.
***side note: There is nothing wrong with having a big ol’ vagina. Nothing. Please don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Fisting will not give you a big vag, but even if it did, you would still be worthy of love, sex, respect, and orgasms. In addition, size queens such as myself will admire you and praise your, um, potential capacity. Again, moving on…
Why does it feel so (so so so) good?
Because your body is made that way. Whereas the outside of your parts (aka vulva and friends) respond to light touch and vibration and sucking and tongues and warmth, the inside (aka your vagina) responds to pressure and fullness. And what better way to experience pressure and fullness than by holding your lover’s hand inside? The opening of the vaginal canal is also rich with nerve endings that are stimulated by things like knuckles and fingers passing through. Happiness.
My lover thinks fisting sounds violent. Is it? Is it mean?
Oh no, dear one. Think about it: in order to get everything inside, a woman has to be calm (or, well, not calm, but relaxed. She can be–and hopefully is–highly charged and excited). Like I said before, she has to want you there. To want you there is the easy part; trusting you there is the hard part. The first few times I was fisted I would be so close to letting her all in, and then I’d think “What if she got stuck!? What if she pokes something!? What if she hurts me?” and I’d tighten down. And then we’d try again, and I’d freak out again. Finally, I remembered that I trusted her. She wasn’t going to hurt me.
If you have any doubts about who you’re with, perhaps fisting isn’t a game you two should play together. If you have no doubts and you trust him or her with all your heart, don’t be suprised if you cry a little bit (or a lot) afterwards. More than likely, your body isn’t used to such large guests. It can be overwhelming.
What supplies do I need?
A hand and a hole. And, for safety and sexiness, gloves and lube (and more lube, and more lube). In a discussion on the topic of fisting and lube, a coworker and I disagreed on what’s best. Know why? Because everyone’s different. “Roxy” said: “The best fisting experiences I’ve had with my partner are when I apply a base layer of Eros Power Cream on my gloved hand and then follow it up with a top layer of GV Gel. The GV Gel makes my hand slick enough to move inwards and the Power is thick enough for comfort once my fist is inside. Both lubes should be applied liberally (especially to the back of the hand) and down all sides of the wrist.” Me, I just use Slippery Stuff Gel, and lots of it.
Next time (eventually. I cannot promise it will be the next blog entry) I will cover “how to” and fancy fisting positions. Until then, check out this link and learn how skeletally skinny models are no longer the cool kids on the block.
To all who think bigger is better,
jameson.
