Category: 
A question from one of our readers: I’m always surprised whenever gays or dykes try to emulate the other. For example, i have a lot of dyke friends who are really into looking and being “faggy.” I assume it goes the other way too(?). so I guess my question is, what traits do you both find adoreable/admireable in the other?
JB: Besides his great sense of style (plaids and stripes can go together) and taste in comedians (Kathy Griffin for example)?… I admire Judah’s sense of humor. Gay people are funny, it’s true. But on a more serious note, I admire his “don’t give a fuck” (excuse my language) attitude when it comes to his sexuality. I admire that in all of my gay guy friends. I’m sure a lot of this strength comes from growing up gay… and little femmy gay boys have it tougher than little tomboy gay girls, I think. I also admire his taste in cocktails… he’s a whiskey boy and I’m down with that.
JM: I’m not sure if any my gay friends & acquaintances try to look like dykes, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they did… nothing really surprises me anymore. To answer your question, though, there’s a lot about lesbians to be adored/admired by gay men, which, not coincidentally, mirrors what Judi said above: their “in your face” attitude - “I’m a DYKE, godammit, like it or not!” - no matter who you are, or what you’re into, that self-awareness & confidence warms the cockles of one’s heart. I think perhaps part of this is the fact that it’s always been easier in our society to be a tomboy-ish little girl rather than a little boy that plays with dolls - there was less shame growing up. And Judi, among many other fabulous lesbians, looks great in plain pants & ties - much better than I do in a mini-skirt…
